Forty hour work week...check. Fifty hours or more away from home...check. Children...check. Not enough time or money...check.
Everyday we get out of bed, leave our homes and kids for hours at a time and go to a job that can't even pay the bills. We do this for many different reasons. We do this because we love our jobs. We do this because we love our kids. We do this because...well what else can we do. Living as a single mother (not married) is a hard task. We spend most of our time away from our kids so the times we spend with our kids are more precious than anything. It's not often as a single working mother that you can truly spend time with your kids as they go through life's many changes. We must make the most out of the time we can spend with our kids. We are raising our kids with morals and values. We are teaching our kids independence. We are teaching our kids to read and write. We are teaching our kids about a higher being (God). We are teaching our kids responsibilty. We are doing all of this in a small window of time. It is not easy being a parent but being a single working mother possesses quite a challenge.
Guilt...check. Absence...check. Financial problems...check, check, check.
If raising great children weren't hard enough, now we must deal with the idea that we don't have enough money to raise our children. We now are stuck with the daunting task of being honest about our financial struggles. Telling the kids, " I'm sorry but mommy really can't afford to buy you that toy." I think kids understand exactly what that means when you say it but it doesn't prevent you from feeling guilt. I know you're thinking back over your life, you know the life before the kids. The plans you made for when you would have kids. You know the before kids checklist: Great husband, great job, lots of money and the ability to buy for your kids what you didn't have for yourself. Well guess what the reality of your situation and many other parents situations are much different than you orginally planned.
My solution is simple to say but has proven much harder to do. Make a new checklist.
Stop feeling guilty...check. Be present in the moment...check. Set spending limits for yourself and your children...check.
There are plenty of solutions to live a better life and make a better life. The resources are available. Support groups are available. Counseling is available. Financial help is available. The power is available. It all lies in our faith.
